Don't let Eddie Griffin give you a lift

"Entertainer" Eddie Griffin crashed a rare Ferrari Enzo worth $1.5 million into a concrete barrier at a racetrack Monday, destroying the car but escaping injury. "Undercover Brother's good at karate and all the rest of that, but the brother can't drive," Griffin said after the accident, referring to one of his past films in what experts think may be a failed attempt at humor. The Ferrari belonged to the executive producer of Griffin's latest cinematic holocaust, who said that he had "mixed feelings" about the wreck.

The only "mixed feelings" that the producer should be having right now is whether he feels more like beating Griffin to death with a tire iron or suffocating him inside of an elephant's ass. The fact that Eddie Griffin was able to wreck someone else's limited edition Ferrari without being seriously injured either speaks volumes about Italian engineering or proves once and for all that there is no God. Until today I didn't really have anything against Eddie Griffin other than that he looks like a cross between Shaft and Rocky the Flying Squirrel, but now I know that the dude is pure evil. Eddie Griffin is to cars what Kevin Federline is to pop starlets.

Update: I've posted a video of the crash below. After watching this a couple of times, my new theory is that Eddie was trying to run over the guy behind the concrete barrier. If you look really carefully, he actually speeds up and steers straight for him. Watch out, Concrete Barrier Man! Eddie's coming to get ya!