Open Letter to Worker Man

Dear Mr. Worker Man Across the Courtyard,

I know that it must have been a shock to see me enter the foyer with my pants around my knees, but you know how it is. I had already lowered my pants when I realized I might be in Lee's office for a while and I needed a book. Time was of the essence, so I thought sneaking out into the foyer and grabbing my book off of the table would be my best option. It was either that or reading the Mr. Swirl bathroom cleaner label.

But let's not assign blame here. I know you've been working on the exterior of the building across the courtyard for a week now, but in my defense, you were being really quiet. I hope you don't think you are fooling anybody because I know what you're up to. You start banging on stuff with hammers at 8 in the morning, but right around 10 all noise goes away. It's clearly a ploy to make the people who hired you think that you are slaving away all day. But I'm on to you.

I know you saw my tushy and probably a bit of my hoo-diddly, but is the whistling necessary? Really?

Yours truly,
The Woman Who Flashed You on the 4th Floor.