Bastille Day

Today is the 14th of July, which is the French national holiday. Since the French have so many days off already, the government requires that on this day all citizens participate in military exercises to prepare for any possible invasion. Mostly this involves throwing their arms up in the air frantically, practicing their German and putting up speed bumps along the borders. Seriously, though, the French have a proud history depending on what book you're reading, so it's not fair to single out their recent military failures as evidence of their inability to do anything right. Besides, there are a lot of other reasons to poke fun of them, as this list of jokes and quotes will attest:

- "Going to war without the French on your side is like going hunting without an accordion." Norman Schwartzkopf

- Q. What's the similarity between a Frenchman and a cue ball? A. The harder you hit them, the more English you get out of them.

- Q: Why do the French like smelly cheeses? A: Well, in a room full of French people, you can't really smell the cheese.

- The Surgeon General got a new law passed: all cigarette boxes must have a picture of a French guy on it.

- Q. How many jokes are there about the French? A. One, the rest are true.

- "I would rather have a German division in front of me than a French one behind me." General George S. Patton

- "You know, the French remind me a little bit of an aging actress of the 1940s who was still trying to dine out on her looks but doesn't have the face for it." John McCain

Feel free to add your own.