Happy Birthday, Vanessa!

Yes, that's right: I referred to my sister by her real name. I am capable of remembering her real name, you know. I don't have to call her Banana or Nana or Ness or Nessa or Bananarama or Vee or any of those countless other things she responds to at this point. No, today is her birthday, so just this once she gets to be called anything she wants (except Dr. Vanderpool, which the AMA insists is still off-limits). I'm sure that at this moment Vanessa is two-thirds of the way into a 44-hour shift and about to help deliver a set of siamese quints, so she probably won't get this birthday greeting in time, but we still wanted to wish her a very happy Vanessa Day. Happy birthday, little sis, and before you take a bite of that Ms. Pacman cake your residents got you, be sure to wash all of the amniotic fluid off of your hands.