SPAM is not just a luncheon meat
Do you love SPAM as much as I do? Well, if you do, then you'll enjoy this recent piece of excrement that I received. The thing that annoys me about this is the greeting. How hard is it to create a macro or write "Dear Sir or Madam" or something generic like that? Dear {First NAME}? Seriously? How lazy are you SPAM generator man? I say we all call this ass and harass him. What say you?
I googled this guy and he really exists. There was even a picture of him on his company's website, but it wasn't loading properly or else he would be immortalized on this blog forever. I would learn how to use photoshop just to put him in a compromising position with Lim-dick and Big Wet Douche.
Dear {First NAME}
Consolidate debt and use your equity to:
- Make home improvements
- Lower your interest rate
- Eliminate debt
- Skip your mortgage payment
At Opteum , we have the industry’s widest selection of mortgage products that will help us provide the right home financing solution for you.
Dear {First NAME}
Consolidate debt and use your equity to:
- Make home improvements
- Lower your interest rate
- Eliminate debt
- Skip your mortgage payment
At Opteum , we have the industry’s widest selection of mortgage products that will help us provide the right home financing solution for you.
Opteum has been rated by borrowers as Lending tree’s highest rate lender.
Our experienced team of mortgage bankers provides personal service that is unmatched in the financial services industry.
Plus, we have your application on file from your initial inquiry and can usually schedule a settlement with in 10 business days!
Joe Dunsavage
Manager
866-894-2787 ext. 140
jdunsavage@opteum.com
1 comment:
Oh , {First NAME} , don't be so hard on Mr. Dunsavage. Who knows? He might be one of those exiled Nigerian princes in need of large sums of money who has now finally found a job. Let him live out his American dream of consolidating people's equity.
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